Late Night Vulnerability

So, so much has been happening and it’s taken a bit of a toll on my creativity.

Mainly working and overworking at my 9-5 has been taking up so much of my time but also, lately, there’s been this lingering feeling.

I don’t know if it’s sadness, dread, stress, or what, but it’s been very weird.

One thing I do know for certain; this past year and a half I think I’ve done a pretty decent job of holding everything together.

Mainly my emotions. Not crying, not letting anyone know when I’m feeling down. And most importantly keeping a tight grip on my depression and not letting it overpower the moments when I do feel good.

Guilt as well because I still very much feel guilty for going on and living my life as if nothing has happened or changed.

Right now though, in this moment, it’s a little different. I’m typing this with a smile on my face, vibing to some good music. But I’m incredibly sad and I feel the loneliness and complete loss of my brother more than ever.

That’s all I wanted to share, just to get it off my chest so I don’t hold it in and combust in a bad way later.

I always say it, but new works and greatness on the way …. as soon as I get over this little hurdle.

Love you all who have been here and continue to return to MyPenWritesNice. The support is appreciated more than you could ever know.

xoxo, Cortney.

Published by mypenwritesnice

Creative Soul. Artist. Perfectionist. Virgo.

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